chelsea.rae.bateman

Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, “Shut it, bitch!” FML
http://www.fmylife.com/13293107


Today, I watched my boss try to stick a magnet to cardboard. FML
http://www.fmylife.com/16671761


Hahaha sounds like something id do

Today, I found out that my boyfriend was cheating on me. But not to worry, he said she’s only in town for a week then he’s done with her. FML
http://www.fmylife.com/16932993


Good plan

Today, I found out that my boyfriend was cheating on me. But not to worry, he said she’s only in town for a week then he’s done with her. FML
http://www.fmylife.com/16932993


Typical one night stands

Today, I ran into a guy that I had gone on a few dates with 3 months ago and slept with him a few times, but then never heard from him again. When he looked at me, I went over and gave him a hug and said “Hey, how are you, Chris?”. He hugged me back and said “Hey there cutie, what’s your name?”. FML


Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML http://www.fmylife.com/2738282


Omg lol

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son’s teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his “special area.” FML http://www.fmylife.com/15472026



naturallybrunete:

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sluts-getting-tipsy:

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Hahaha

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML


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